I Think My Butt’s Getting Big????????


It was the summer of 2002. I was pregnant with Harrison. My ex and I came to Delaware for a family reunion. One of the hottest songs that summer was Nelly, “Hot in Here”. Well, that was my song.

I was dancing and singing my favorite part. “I think my butt’s getting big.” Mommy was yelling at me to sit down. She thought I was going to go into labor.

A few weeks ago we had family photos taken. It was a great day. But it is nothing like seeing yourself in pictures, to make you do a second look. Where is Photoshop when you need it?

I started thinking about my struggle with my weight. I will lose ten pounds of water and gain 15 pounds back. Spanx is a wonderful thing. But Spanx can cut off circulation and that’s not cute.

My exercise plan isn’t working out. I can’t make it to the gym in the morning. I am up at 5:00 am. But I am getting the kids ready for the bus. There isn’t enough time in between before I go to work to go to the gym.

After work, there’s appointments, and the kids and homework. To be quite honest I am too busy thinking about what to cook for dinner and going through our evening ritual. I tried working out when Sydney falls asleep. I would go for a walk or a “pretend” run.

I admit I have been stress eating. If I could just find a way to relieve the stress. Oh, I guess that is where the exercise comes in to play.
I will create a goal for myself. I will workout in my garage like Rocky. I am not trying to be a certain size. There isn’t a magic number I want to see on the scale. There are however some clothes that I would like to fit into without wearing a corset.

With the holidays near. This is my time to eat from now until New Years Day. I have decided to put more effort into me. Focus more on what bring me happiness. Not being selfish but I deserve this.

I deserve time with my children and time away from them. I deserve time to focus on finishing my book. I deserve time advocating and meeting new families on the autism journey. I deserve to be happy. And the only that holds the key to my happiness is me.

Our family photos were a wake up call for me. My children are getting older. Life is precious. And tomorrow is not promised.


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