Turning 40 wasn’t doom and gloom for me. When I turned 40 I felt that my life had clarity and I had many aha moments along the way. At 40 I realized that my marriage was over. My life for my kids and I would change drastically. I was already functioning as a single mother so to speak, so I was used to that. I thanked God for giving me the strength to endure everything else on my plate.
When I turned 40, back in 2012, I developed a new set of norms to live by. I’m sharing this with all of you because you may be at a crossroads in your life. Maybe you just had an “aha” moment or you are experiencing a major change in your life. Don’t be afraid to let go and start over. You make the rules.
Rule #1 – Stop and Pray
I’ve always prayed but when life was going good I stopped my prayer time. As soon as something upsetting would happen. Then I knew it was time for me to have a little talk with Jesus. When I realized that I was neglecting my prayer life and only praying when I needed God for something, I knew I had to change. It was at that time that I knew if I was going to have victory, I would need prayer daily in my life.
Rule #2 – Where Do I Belong?
It’s okay if I don’t fit in. This isn’t high school. I am a grown woman. I don’t need to be in the “in” crowd. Right now I love my life and friends. If you want to be a part of my journey, than I welcome you. But if I am not pretty enough, thin enough, or rich enough for your inner circle than “Bye Felicia”.
Rule #3- Fashion Rules
Fashion rules are overrated. I realize that yoga pants are for yoga. But let me tell you I can make yoga pants look like dressy casual for the workplace. The problem is that some of you are ruining my yoga pants idea. Follow these tips to make it work for you. First, the yoga pants should be black. I like the Merona Brand from Target. Secondly, the yoga pants shouldn’t be skin-tight either. They will look like dressy slacks if you buy a size larger, just trust me. Finally, the key is in which top you choose to wear. The top MUST cover your bottom. Now keep in mind. I am a second grade teacher. I love my kiddos to death. But everyday someone sneezes on me, puts boogers and glue on me. So this yoga pants idea works for me on occasion. I almost forgot, I will still wear white after Labor Day.
Rule #4 – Mistakes Are In The Past
The days of me bringing up mistakes from my past are done. Mistakes teach us lessons and even make us stronger. When people realize the mistakes that they have made, they become better than they were before. Leave your mistakes in the past. Don’t carry them with you. That is extra baggage that is not needed for your new journey.
Rule #5 – End Toxic Friendships and Relationships
Sometimes you have to remove a toxic person from your life. You may not realize it, but that person is draining the life out of you. They don’t have your best interest at heart. If that person makes you question your every move, you can do without that in your life. Love yourself enough to move on and let go. There will be days when you just don’t give a ____! Guess what? That is okay, you are human and that is normal. I’m not telling you to put yourself on a pedestal. You should love yourself enough to surround yourself with people who love you for you, and not what they can get from you. The best years are always ahead of you.
Remember you have the ability to light up every room that you walk into.